ARGH!

yeah, another day i tell myself i'm gonna study and end up out of the house doing nothing... well ,thats not totally true. i'm a trevor's playing dawn of war. i wonder whats going on later on today. no updates on anything really. i'm really not kidding when i say that my life is a pool of boredom right now. it oozes with dullness. the air is thick with lack of inspiration, and i'm starting to realise that this bland feeling might be permanent. maybe i'm now precipitating, no more stirring, now it's all settling at the bottom. it's strange when the only two things i look foward to all week are 40k friday and sunday service. i don't look foward to movies, tv show episodes, school days, even sleep i've been dreading somewhat these days. i'm in serious need of something extraordinary. or maybe i just need to start feeling that ordinary things are more wonderful than they trully are. it's not a lack of people, i have plenty of those in my life. without trying to be tacky i do feel like the narator from fight club before he meets tyler durden. everything is figuretively single serving. no substance, no depth. people are semester friends, people i have a relationship with for the duration of a class.
anyways we're going for food.